I forget where I first heard The Boxer Rebellion but I’ve liked them for a long time. The song “Big Ideas” is totally about meeting someone and seeing the amazing future you could have – all those big ideas you have for them and even though the timing isn’t great you’re still hopeful. Alas this post isn’t about finding my person and all the big ideas I have for us… It’s about writing this book I’ve been yapping about for a decade plus. It didn’t feel REAL until I got my cover designed – now that it’s done and I have my alpha reader, editing and beta reader phases planned out…actually publishing it going to happen. This ‘big idea’ is going to come to fruition!
Writing a blog and posting personal stuff was incredibly daunting at first – sometimes it still is. There is a delicate balance between being authentic (one of the keystones I try to live by) and still being private. I try to always write from the heart (but recognize that I do change my stance on situations sometimes). I try to write the way I speak (which is pretty ‘real talk’). I try to challenge myself in how I think of things, I look at things etc. Recently a friend taught me the art of not allowing everyone in your life to have access to you 24/7. You can choose when to reply to emails, you can choose what level of response a text warrants. Passive medium versus active. In deciding to publish a blog I can pretty much control who reads it to a certain degree. You’re only here because you know me – whether we still talk or not is irrelevant. I’m hardly famous!
I sometimes see these memes about the creative process and think “oh gosh that is 100% spot on” –
So why then am I freaking myself out about publishing this book? Yes it will be on Amazon (self -publishing is the way to go I’ve decided) and yes, technically anyone could access it but really the likelihood anyone outside of my bubble buying it is slim. So then, who cares? Why am I worried about what people think? What’s the worst case scenario? Someone, somewhere could read it, judge me and then post shit online. Okay…so what happens? Nothing. My life continues to exist and I continue to be fabulous. Not everyone is going to love you and that has nothing to do with you.
I saw this in my TimeHop and it TOTALLY hit home – I will just keep sparkling – and if someone doesn’t like it, they can move on! 🙂
